The Power of a Simple Thank You
A couple weeks ago I listened to “The Power of a Simple Thank You” with writer AJ Jacobs on Ted Radio Hour and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
In his book, Thanks a Thousand: A Gratitude Journey, he decided to thank every single person involved in making his morning cup of coffee. The resulting journey transformed his life and revealed secrets about how gratitude can make us all happier, more generous, and more connected. His journey is fascinating and had a big impact on me.
I’ve found that gratitude helps my mental state, but it’s a discipline I have to work at. It’s easy to fall back into a deficient mindset - focusing on what I’m missing- rather than on what I have. So this Talk really inspired me to reorient myself towards slowing down, savoring, appreciating and focusing on all the things that are going right.
I’ll summarize what he learned on his gratitude journey, and perhaps you’ll find it inspiring as well!
Key one: Noticing
The first step in practicing gratitude is taking a moment to pause and notice.
As human beings we get into habits, it’s how we process information, we can’t notice all the details all the time. But at least some of the time, we can fight against habituation, and savor. We can pause for 2 seconds and really focus on the thing in front of us. Slowing down and savoring is what it’s all about.
Step two: Going deeper
The next step is going deeper: behind everything we use, eat, or drink in our daily lives, are millions of stories. Part of training ourselves to be more grateful is trying to really listen to the stories of each person so we don't flatten or stereotype the people we encounter.
AJ Jacobs shared this Ted Talk by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: The Danger of a Single Story. In her story she warns that if we hear only a single story about another person or country, we risk a critical misunderstanding. If we’re not listening, and not trying to understand all the unique stories around us, then we are really missing out.
Key three: Gratitude as a spark to action
Stories should lead to action. The dark side of gratitude is it could lead to complacency, thinking “well everything is great”. But in reality, the research shows that gratitude will spark you to action and makes you want to pay it forward.
Mónica Ramírez shares how we can make space for marginalized communities to tell their stories, and how this can lead to action. She shares how making space for marginalized communities to share their stories has the power to transform and connect.
Key Four: Wanna be happy? Be grateful
It's not happiness that makes us grateful, but gratefulness that makes us happy. Grateful living is becoming aware that every moment is a “given moment”. Each moment is a gift. Humans want to be happy... and in this Ted talk Benedictine monk David Steindl-Rast says gratitude and happiness go hand in hand. He shares ideas on how we can all slow down to appreciate the world around us. An inspiring lesson in slowing down, looking where you're going, and above all, being grateful.
Key Five: Awe and Wonder
Does science ruin the magic of life? The more we learn about the astonishing behavior of the universe -- the more we stand in awe. Listen to Robin Ince share about wonder and how we have the power to make our own purpose, how incredible is that?
Key Six: Faking it until you feel it
It's easier to act your way into a new way of thinking rather than to think your way into a new way of acting. Gratitude is a practice and a disciple that can change our brains. But we don't always feel like being grateful. And it can be exhausting to be grateful for every little thing. AJ Jacobs encourages us to find one small, tiny thing each day to be grateful for. To get creative with our thank yous.
